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| 1) Let them know you are a bit frayed on the outside, but if they get to know you there is some compassion, but if they get to know you better, it's all darkness |
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| 2) For the plain talking no nonsense kinda guy, but at 7p why not buy three, cos who doesn't like getting three of the same thing? |
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| 3) One for those who need a little nudge, again Asda highlight your own smarts buy simulating a price sticker on the print highlighting you are careful with money. |
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| 4) It's well known that illiciting sympathy paves the golden road to sex |
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| 5) Watch their face light up as they open this and realise you are a psycho. Obviously make sure you are watching from a tree at least ten meters away. |
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| 6)For those who like word games and beating around the bush |
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| 7) Never presume anyone is as weird as you, and if you do happen to shit yourself while writing a card don't let them know. You can get away with it, unless you are writing the card in front of them. |
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| 9) In current times, this actually says a lot |
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| 10) There's no coming back from making this kind of mistake |
